Wednesday, January 9, 2013

My Momma Heart Hurts

The tragedy in Newtown, CT before Christmas has affected everyone. We told the kids about it after it happened because we knew they would hear about it from other kids at school and also because there is now more of a police presence at their schools.  Which I have mixed feelings about. So thankful that they are there as a sign of support to our schools and kids, but disgusted that there is even a reason for them to be there.

But anyway. That's beside the point. We told the kids, but we really haven't talked about it in front of them very much. It's not something we want them to worry about. Yet despite our efforts to shield them as much as possible, it has affected them. As least it has Sara.

Last night she came into our room in the middle of the night last night and said she had a bad dream. I pulled her into me and prayed for her and sent her back to bed. I know. Great mom, huh?? I am not a morning person, or a middle of the night person. :)  She came back a few minutes later and asked if she could sleep on our floor. I sent her back to her room again and she went back to sleep.

Now, tonight as she was getting into bed, she asked me if she could tell me her bad dream so she wouldn't have it again. When I looked in her eyes, I could see the tears welling up. I realized how serious it was so I sat down and held her hands and let her tell me.  Bless her heart. She told me and it was a horrible dream.  We were at the farm and she went in the camper and she looked out the window and saw a soldier and me and her daddy and everyone else were dead.  It broke my heart.

I just held her while she cried and assured her that wasn't real, and we talked how we turn to God when we are scared. We quoted scripture that she can say when she's scared and I told her when Satan is attacking us, we have the power of JESUS in us to demand that he leave us alone. It was so amazing to see her eyes light up at the realization that Satan does not have control over us. 

My sweet little girl. My sweet girl that internalizes her thoughts. My sweet girl who worries about her family. My sweet girl who protects her family. It hurts my heart that she has to even be aware of such evil in this world. But, I will not let Satan win this battle. It THRILLS me that I can teach my child that Satan is not in control, that he has to flee at the name of JESUS! It makes my heart happy that we have access to that power because of the price that Jesus paid for me and my family and everyone who believes in Him.

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